


The Wind Master's Fan

by azureqingge



Category: Heaven Official's Blessing, tian guan ci fu, 天官赐福 - 墨香铜臭 | Tiān Guān Cì Fú - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
Genre: Alternate Ending, Angst?, Beefleaf deserves a happy ending, Happy Ending, M/M, Mistaken Relationship, beefleaf, he xuan briefly female, how to tag, hua cheng's mischief, shuangxuan, stalker he xuan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-14 01:33:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28788006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/azureqingge/pseuds/azureqingge
Summary: Even though the disguise he used wasn’t much different from his real appearance, the softer features obviously all point to Ming Yi, not He Xuan.Feeling an odd sense of frustration, he puts the fan back. He had no intention of showing himself to Shi QingXuan after reacting the way he did at Puqi shrine, but seeing that painting made him reconsider.
Relationships: He Xuan|Shi Qing Xuan, Hua Cheng|Xie Lian, Hualian - Relationship, beefleaf - Relationship
Comments: 12
Kudos: 65





	The Wind Master's Fan

The last thing Shi Qingxuan remembers was that place. And the voice that made him feel safe and gave him even a little bit of courage despite the immense fear he felt during this whole ordeal, now sent shivers down his spine at the mere memory of it.

“Do you have anything else you want to say?”

“... I want to die.” This was Shi QingXuan’s reply. Not only did he lose his brother, he also lost his best friend. Now that he thought about it… did he even have one?

When his field of vision was slowly engulfed by the looming hand, he utters the words he felt right at that moment when he lost everything just before his eyes closed on their own, “I… loved you.”

An unknown amount of time passed. When he opened his eyes, certain to see perhaps the depths of hell and other terrifying places he could think of, he was surprised to see Xie Lian and the familiar ceiling of Puqi Shrine once again.

He lived for years in comfort not knowing it was all at the expense of not only one person, but a whole family. Shi Wudu paid for it with his life and he paid for it with his godhood. The person he deemed his best friend betrayed him and the most painful thing was… he wasn’t to blame. No matter how much he wanted to hate He Xuan, the fact remains that there wouldn’t be a fire if it wasn’t ignited. And it was Shi Wudu who started the flame.

A series of emotions tugged at him, fighting for the side each represents. And both people being important to him, for two weeks he found himself in perpetual resentment and understanding, unable to choose who was in the wrong.

He hated his brother for resorting to such methods, for turning a blind eye to the people he aggravated even after his ascension and for holding onto his pride until his death. Yet he also loved him for protecting him and for putting him above anyone else to the point that he had to resort to trampling over other people. He loved him so much that he was willing to embrace a life of suffering in exchange for his life and to atone for his sins. Even though he wanted to give Shi Wudu a beating and hug him at the same time, even that wasn’t possible now.

On the other hand, he also couldn’t blame He Xuan. His family not only died, but suffered immensely. Anyone would want to punish the person responsible. More than that, he also befriended him of his own accord. So he wanted to believe He Xuan wasn’t really planning to deceive him. But due to circumstances, it couldn’t be helped. Of course he hated him. For killing Shi Wudu and for betraying him, but what makes it all frustrating was that He Xuan’s actions were justified. Even so, Shi QingXuan couldn’t help but ask, Wasn’t our friendship enough? While he cried over that question that He Xuan answered by decapitating his brother, he also knew deep down that asking such a question was unfair. 

One morning, he was sweeping outside the shrine while Xie Lian and Hua Cheng went out to town. He had to admit, while Hua Cheng’s words stung, it also made sense. He wasn’t about to stay here and mope because whether he accepted it or not, his brother and best friend are never coming back. But one thing’s for sure, he was making it difficult for the only one left who still cares about him.

Due to the degree of loss as well as the many forms of betrayal he went through, he failed to see that even though fate knocked on his door and collected payment for all the years he lived in glory, it didn’t exactly take everything away from him. The fact that during his worst, Xie Lian was there to support him and encourage him everyday without fail was proof of it.

And so, he volunteered to clean the house with his newfound resolve that he would never let Xie Lian make that expression again. Even if he did, he would make sure he wasn’t the cause of it. 

Moving further from the house, he began to gather the leaves at the side. Just as he was about to step away to clean another area, he heard the crunching of leaves behind him. As soon as the sound reached his ears, an inexplicable sense of threat accompanied it, compelling him to quickly turn around.

“Hm?”

There was no one. Quickly rubbing his eyes didn’t help him see whatever invisible entity made that sound. Perhaps an animal? Nevertheless, his gut feeling told him it was best not to find out and so he returned to the house.

After closing the door, he proceeds to pour himself a cup of water. “Ahahahaha—I must be out of my mind…”

“... Shi QingXuan.”

Shi QingXuan, in the middle of drinking, reflexively turns at the sound, failing to recognize the voice prior to his reaction. Sitting on the chair with his legs crossed, clad in black with sharp eyes trained on him was none other than He Xuan. But this time, there was no more disguise.

A million thoughts instantly flooded Shi QingXuan’s head. The mere sight of that pale and bloodless face was enough for his thoughts to relive his brother’s murder, causing him to choke and spray water everywhere. Just as he was about to accept everything, move on and live for Xie Lian… this merciless ghost king had to appear now.

Whatever he was here for, it definitely was anything but good! Hua Cheng and Xie Lian were away. Staying here only awaited death! And now that the water he accidentally sprayed out reached He Xuan’s face, expecting a swift and painless death was obviously scratched from the options.

Engaged in a staring contest, with He Xuan not even so much as flinching from the water assault, Shi QingXuan decided that if this day would be his end, he wanted to at least fight. If there was a slight possibility that his body wouldn’t be fed to the dogs or any other creatures, Xie Lian would know that he struggled and that he decided to live for him, if not for himself. That he listened to him and changed his mind.

Just as He Xuan reached inside his sleeve, Shi QingXuan, even with his limbs shaking badly, mustered his courage and threw the cup at him. He didn’t even look before running as fast as he could towards the nearest exit which was the window. 

Unfortunately, the cup thrown with shaky force naturally went flying in a low curve rather than a straight line. It stopped mid-air and He Xuan sat stunned for a moment. Following the sound of a thud on the table, Shi QingXuan, who was halfway out the window was yanked by the back of his collar.

“Shi QingXuan!” He Xuan shouts, his voice deeply offended.

Shi QingXuan, on the other hand, flails more violently, eyes closed as he shouts back, “No! I can’t die yet! Let me go!”

“Listen—” He Xuan tries to speak, gripping his shoulders but Shi QingXuan struggled with all his might, pushing and kicking He Xuan, who wasn’t at all using any excessive force to subdue him.

“Please! I can’t die yet! I can’t! Not until I repay him! Can’t you just wait a little while longer?!” Shi QingXuan screams, drowning out whatever it was He Xuan was trying to say. He managed to stick his leg out the window once more.

Due to his panic, he kicked He Xuan on the stomach with his other leg, sending the other stepping backwards. Seeing the opportunity, he quickly turned, successfully climbing out of the window.

Thanking the gods for this unexpected escape, his relief was short-lived when a hand grabbed his collar once again.

“You haven’t changed!” He Xuan shouts from behind.

Panic and horror compelled Shi QingXuan to run when he saw He Xuan stepping out the window. But his collar, caught by He Xuan, forced the latter to tumble forward, dragging Shi QingXuan along with him. It was then that Shi QingXuan felt a sting run up his right leg. 

“Ow…” Shi QingXuan managed to utter. Then he suddenly remembered. This was it. This was as far as he went. “Ming… xiong…” he whispers.

“...” He Xuan quietly stares at Shi QingXuan’s trembling back underneath him. “... What happened was—”

“Lord Wind Master?” another voice cut in.

Shi QingXuan looked up to see Xie Lian and Hua Cheng standing in front meters away from them, carrying lots of bags.

He didn’t know when it happened but he suddenly realized the weight on his back was gone and that he was alone on the floor.

“He came here to return this,” Xie Lian sets a fan on the table.

After Shi QingXuan explained to Xie Lian his apparent near death experience, He Xuan approached Xie Lian one morning while Shi QingXuan was still asleep.

Shi QingXuan stared at his fan. He... fixed it?

While Shi QingXuan was pondering over the contradictions of that day and this fan, the question Xie Lian brought up sent his brain from sizzling to toasting.

“H—HOW COULD THIS BE? WE—WE… WE WERE FRIENDS! BESIDES, HE WAS THIS CLOSE TO TELLING ME TO GET LOST!”

“Have you never looked at him that way?” Xie Lian asks.

“Are you crazy? Of course not! We were friends! And I do love switching to my female form, but it doesn't mean I—I—I thought of... with a man!”

“Then why are you so clingy—”

“Isn't that what friends do? Of course I'm clingy! It's no different from children playing and strangling each other, that kind of affection!”

“Lord Wind Master… do you not feel the same?”

“I… I... don’t know. I've only ever looked at him as my Ming-xiong… Besides… it’s not like that, Your Highness. And if you look at what happened… well… I didn't even think we would end up like this.”

Xie Lian watched Shi QingXuan who had a bitter smile on his face. Hearing Shi QingXuan’s answer, he purses his lips, ultimately deciding that there was no need to tell what he witnessed that day.

When He Xuan gave him the fan, he noticed his split-second glances at the door. The miniscule changes in his expression, Xie Lian thought, were enough to expose his true feelings and he could say with confidence that they did not contain a trace of killing intent… but rather of regret and something else.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay on your own?” Xie Lian helps Shi QingXuan pack his things that weren’t much to begin with.

“I will be fine! I managed to find a place to stay in town. And since you also go to town, I assure you our paths will cross once again! You may also visit me!” Shi QingXuan sits back on the ox-cart carrying hay.

“Be careful. Should anything happen, you are always welcome here,” Xie Lian steps back.

“Gege, no need to worry so much. He will be fine,” Hua Cheng says.

“Don’t forget to bring Crimson Rain Sought Flower with you!” Shi QingXuan puts down his bag.

“I know. But danger lurks in every corner. If not ghosts, there might be people out there—”

“No. I daresay it is danger that will stay out of his way,” Hua Cheng cuts Xie Lian off.

Xie Lian immediately understood, shutting his mouth. Shi Qingxuan, on the other hand, only tilted his head, “Huh? What do you—woah!

The ox-cart started moving on the bumpy road. Shi QingXuan did not manage to finish his question, instead giving them a final farewell. 

Although it took some time, due to his perseverance, Shi QingXuan managed to find work in town, save up, and find a place of his own. This was the first step. If he managed to stop being a burden to Xie Lian, repaying him was also possible.

Running scenarios of inviting Xie Lian and Hua Cheng to dinner at his house, he started cleaning the house. It was a decent one. Although a little small, at least there wasn’t much to clean and the space was enough to move around. Another problem, which he was in no position to complain since his income was limited, was the proximity of his house to others. The part of town he settled in was the least populated area and to someone like him who was always in the company of people, it was rather lonely.

“Let’s see…” Shi QingXuan counts his change shortly after buying some new paint brushes and ink… when suddenly someone grabbed his money pouch just as he finished putting his change inside. “What the—hey!”

As the thief made its way through the crowd, Shi QingXuan leaves his purchase to some vendor along the way to give chase.

Soon, he was some distance apart, but was able to see the thief enter an alley at the last second. Seconds after he reaches the alley, to his surprise, what awaited him wasn’t an empty site. The thief was there… thoroughly beaten up. His money pouch was a foot away.

“Who just—” he looks around, not finding a third person. Outside, people were passing by, minding their own business. 

He thought, My life must be so messed up that fate might’ve decided to at least give me a little bit of luck this time. Picking up his money pouch, he was about to leave when his conscience got the better of him.

After getting his paintbrushes and ink back, as well as sending the thief to the guards to be taken care of instead of bleeding out in the cold, he settled on the desk and began painting.

Shi QingXuan knew how to paint, but there was a difference between knowing how and being good at it. He was even more convinced of this fact when Hua Cheng’s painting finally caught his attention after he decided to slowly let things go.

After countless pleading and pestering, Shi QingXuan was able to get Hua Cheng to teach him when he proposed a deal. If he acquired the skills to make a living, he would move out. Aside from finally being alone with Xie Lian, it would also not only lessen Xie Lian’s worries for Shi QingXuan, he would also be praised. This wasn’t a bad deal. And so Hua Cheng immediately summoned some brushes and paper out of thin air and their first session began. 

Just remembering the countless insults his ears suffered when he was beginning was enough to make Shi QingXuan’s head throb. But he was thankful to Hua Cheng all the same.

Although it wasn’t as good as Hua Cheng’s, the quality was enough to entice patrons. Setting out to sell his paintings, he stopped by the entertainment section to see the status of his application. He was indeed hired. Not as a courtesan or a dancer, but as someone who helps dress them up. Witnessing Shi QingXuan’s skills firsthand convinced the owner of the establishment, since it meant fattening his purse with his service.

After a long day at work, he settles on his desk once more. There, he noticed his fan, sitting at the corner. “Hm? Did I put it here?”

Reaching for it, he examines it carefully. When he picked up his brush, he suddenly thought of the person he once thought was his best friend. He could still remember how he always told him to get lost but always remained by his side, how he scolded him at every turn yet always gave in to his whims. 

_What he looked like staring at me with no expression…_

“Er…” Shi QingXuan snaps back to reality, having realized he just went and painted Ming Yi on his fan. “Ming… xiong…” he whispers, tears rolling down his cheeks. “No… there wasn’t even a Ming-xiong.” He puts the fan carefully inside the drawer. “I… miss you… even though I should hate you.”

He Xuan stares at Shi QingXuan’s sleeping form. Then, he walks over to the desk, pulling the drawer out and reaching inside. He finds the fan he fixed… along with a beautifully painted Ming Yi on the fan. Even though the disguise he used wasn’t much different from his real appearance, the softer features obviously all point to Ming Yi, not He Xuan.

Feeling an odd sense of frustration, he puts the fan back. He had no intention of showing himself to Shi QingXuan after reacting the way he did at Puqi shrine, but seeing that painting made him reconsider.

“You said… you loved me,” He Xuan crosses his legs, staring intensely at Shi QingXuan who was in the farthest corner of the dining area.

“I did?... I did… I did?!”

While Shi QingXuan was panicking by himself at the corner, He Xuan sighs, almost glaring at him, “... did you mean it?”

Snapping back to reality, Shi QingXuan answered defensively, “Of course I did! It may be fake to you, but it wasn't to me!”

“That's not what I meant.”

As usual, He Xuan’s face was stiff, with no expression whatsoever. But the tone of his voice carried the slightest bit of tremor, which Shi QingXuan noticed but couldn’t point out what the reason was.

“So… it's all in the past?” He Xuan stands, his head hung low.

Shi QingXuan steps closer to the door, “What do you want.”

He Xuan notices, his voice turning chilly to icy, “I want you to answer my question.”

“I don't know. Why do you want to know? You killed my brother, you left me. You hate me yet you keep going near me. Shouldn't you avoid the person you hate?” Shi QingXuan’s voice trembles, the memories of He Xuan’s betrayal were already wringing tears from his eyes.

It was true. The next morning as if that painting summoned the person himself, Shi QingXuan was shocked to find He Xuan leaning by the door just as he was about to go to work. He panicked a few times as He Xuan followed him around. Sometimes, the workers in the establishment he worked in would suddenly look like He Xuan and when he screams or does something inappropriate, they would revert to their original appearance in the blink of an eye, as if it never happened. Sometimes, it would happen with the vendors of the shops he frequents. And finally, when he returns home from work, He Xuan would be there, sitting and observing him in silence.

For days, the same thing would happen. And when he finally understood that at least, He Xuan had no intention of killing him just yet, did he calm down. Still, the mere sight of the ghost king would make him shake badly in fear.

“If I hate somebody, I’d kill them,” He Xuan answers coldly, raising his head.

“...” Shi QingXuan dared not speak, his eyes trained to his feet. 

As silence enveloped the space, He Xuan scoffed, as if the very sight thoroughly insulted him. His brows furrowing with indignance, he says, “... I wonder who it was that left first.”

The scorn in his voice forces Shi QingXuan’s gaze back to him. As far as he knew, he doesn’t recall anything that happened with him leaving He Xuan. “What?”

He Xuan steps forward but stops when Shi QingXuan flinches, “Yes, I killed your brother. I killed your only family. But have you ever thought about how your family killed mine?”

“But it was my—” Shi QingXuan trails off. “... I begged you.”

Shi Wudu started all of this to protect him. He was about to say that it was all his fault, that his brother was forced to do all of it. But no matter how much he insisted, deep down, he knew it wasn’t just his own weakness. Shi Wudu resorted to underhanded means and not only had he no intention of coming back for those he devastated, he even showed no remorse until the end.

He Xuan continues, “Then, let’s put it this way. If you were in my position, what would you have done?”

“...” Shi QingXuan’s silence continued. The questions He Xuan threw at him were all answered in his head… except for this one. He didn’t know. The only reason he didn’t pursue He Xuan was that he had no power against a ghost king, more so in his current state. Even if he did, he just felt he didn’t have the right since this was his brother’s fault. But if the situation was reversed, saying that vengeance didn’t brush his mind was certainly hypocrisy.

“Shi QingXuan… didn’t you always choose him?” He Xuan breaks the silence.

“Choose? Wha—What are you saying? Ming-xiong, I never chose anyone! How could I?” Shi QingXuan replies. He wasn’t sure if it was his imagination, but He Xuan’s expression looked like it shifted a bit again.

Feeling a vein pop, He Xuan tried his best to ignore Shi QingXuan calling the wrong name again and continued. “I tried to stop you. But you went to him anyway. To you, your brother was above everything.” _Even me._

“... That’s not it! It was—”

“I understand. He’s your brother. Of course, you’d choose him,” He Xuan cuts him off. On the surface, his words carried no emotion at all, but if one looked closely, the tiny difference in his expression was enough to give him away if only fear and tears did not blur Shi QingXuan’s vision.

He understands Shi QingXuan. He also knew both he and Shi Wudu put Shi QingXuan in a difficult spot. He understood but he couldn’t help but feel angry. Life finally gave him the opportunity to get what he wanted most but why did it have to dangle such a tempting offer only to extend another hand to demand payment? It messed with him first, so doesn’t he deserve this much?

It could have been someone else. Why did Shi QingXuan have to be Shi Wudu’s brother? Why did he have to be friends with Shi QingXuan? Why did fate have to put them in an impossible situation?

He cared for Shi QingXuan and he had the option to turn and walk away from revenge. Yet, he didn’t. He knew that grasping that hand was the same as forfeiting his friendship with Shi QingXuan. And the fact remains that this was his own choice.

Meanwhile, Shi QingXuan noticing He Xuan’s silence, forgot all about the possible danger he was facing, “Ming—”

“I am not Ming Yi!” He Xuan shouts, voice hoarse.

Shi QingXuan retracts the hand he reached out, “... I know. I’m s—sorry.”

He Xuan takes a few seconds to pull himself together, then, “You ask what it is I want? I want us both to… stop living in the past.”

“What?” Shi QingXuan turns his line of sight from the door back to He Xuan.

“Are you deaf? I’m not telling you to forget what happened. I just… want to start over again.”

“Ahahahahahaha! Ming—Young Master He… uhm… hahahaha—”

“What is it?” He Xuan’s brows furrow in annoyance, knowing what the reaction meant. Shi QingXuan laughs without stopping when he’s nervous and afraid. 

“Hahahahahahaha! N—Nothing! Hahahahaha—”

“... Shi. Qing. Xuan.” He Xuan slowly repeats, not even bothering to hide how irritated he was, “Whatever it is you’re thinking, stop it. I will not harm you.”

“Hahahahahhahahaha—really? That’s—hahahaha—um… reassuring! Hahahaha—”

He Xuan crosses his arms, staring at him without saying anything. And the next few minutes, they stared at each other across the room with Shi QingXuan laughing by himself. By the time the laughter died down, He Xuan’s expression was already so dark. He spits, “Are you done?”

But his intimidating tone triggered Shi QingXuan’s laughing spree once again, “Hahahahaha—yeah, um, I’m done! Hahahahahahaha—”

“You're not. You're still laughing,” He Xuan closes his eyes, reaching up to his temple to massage the area.

This time, Shi QingXuan forced himself to stop, “S—Sorry.”

Only then did He Xuan opened his eyes, “Then, tell me what you think.”

“... Y—Young Master He… I—I—”

“Stop.” He Xuan raises his palm.

“Huh?” Puzzled, Shi QingXuan tilts his head.

“I will give you some time. I won’t barge in here or in your workplace. In exchange, don’t push me away.”

Those were all the words He Xuan said before Shi QingXuan found himself alone in the room without getting a chance to turn him down.

“Why are you suddenly giving me all this work?” He Xuan scowls.

“Have you forgotten? Or should I help you recall?” Without warning, a huge pile of papers were slammed on the table.

He Xuan eyes the pile and clears his throat, “No. And it’s not about that. Ghost City had no trouble even without you being there before, so why are you asking for my assistance now?”

“Oh? If I didn’t, would you even be able to pay at all?”

Sensing that something was up even though he couldn’t quite determine exactly what it was, He Xuan sighs, half his thoughts straying and half of it in attendance, “Fine.”

“Consider yourself lucky. I am offering you a stable means to repay your debt. Otherwise, how would you do it?”

“...” He Xuan maintains his silence. This arrangement was also one of the reasons his pestering came to a halt.

Even though he knew both he and Shi QingXuan needed time to be apart to cope with things, He Xuan couldn’t help but send out clones to watch over him, preventing all sorts of unfortunate events that came his way. Be it pickpockets, robbers and whatnot were all disposed of before they could even touch him. Still, clones were different from the real deal.

The next few weeks had been quiet. There was no sign of He Xuan anywhere. Although Shi QingXuan was able to breathe a sigh of relief, he knew that it wouldn’t last long. He Xuan said he will give him some time. It definitely meant he’ll be back one day.

“But for what?” Shi QingXuan sighs.

“QingXuan, are you okay?” a pretty lady, one he was currently putting some powder on, peers at his face.

Shi QingXuan was startled, having realized he was talking to himself, “Oh! Um, it’s nothing.”

“Right. Why don’t we sit and talk later?”

Shi QingXuan smiles, “That would be nice.”

After working hours, she and Shi QingXuan sat down for tea in a nearby teashop. New to the place, Shi QingXuan took pity and showed her the ropes. Now, they were almost inseparable.

The weather was nice, with the sun going down, the two chatted basically about anything, until the lady herself brought it up, “QingXuan, you know you can always tell me what’s bothering you.”

“It’s nothing,” Shi QingXuan waves his hands. If this was some normal problem, he sees no harm in telling. Unfortunately, it was the kind that left him awake these nights fearing his head might fly any time, to which a dainty lady can do little to nothing at all.

“Really?” she smirks incredulously, “Well, why don’t we go out this weekend? It will be my treat since you’ve been very considerate of me these past few weeks.”

Shi QingXuan’s eyes widened. Actually, being busy and cautious felt lonely. Aside from missing Xie Lian, he was a sociable person that required the company of others every so often. It would be a good opportunity to unwind.

“That sounds fun! Okay, I’m in!”

The lady leans over, “Then, I’ll see you soon. I’ll come over to your house.” She gives Shi QingXuan a peck on the cheek.

“Eek!” Shi QingXuan’s screech echoed through the room right after the door was slammed open.

Having finished preparing earlier than expected, Shi QingXuan was waiting for her to arrive when He Xuan suddenly barged in, stomping inside like he was on the verge of throwing a fit.

“What are you doing these past few weeks, flaunting about extravagantly?” He Xuan demands, clearly angry.

Shi QingXuan’s hands shook from fear, “Huh? Why are you mad? Did—did I do something wrong?”

“Answer me,” He Xuan says, quietly and impatiently.

“Why are you being like this—”

The sound of soft knocking interrupts them, along with a voice, “QingXuan?”

“M—Ming-xiong, I have to go—” Shi QingXuan hastily walks to the door when a hand clamps down his arm.

He Xuan was looking at him with such ire that his legs almost buckled just imagining what would happen next. It can’t be helped since he vividly remembers these hands separating a head from a body not too long ago with brute strength.

But another terrifying development was He Xuan, without keeping his eyes off him, raised his palm in the direction of the door. 

“Send her away,” He Xuan orders, his voice cold.

“W—What? M—Ming-xiong, p—please… why now—why? Why are you doing—” Shi QingXuan feels his blood run cold.

He Xuan squints his eyes in displeasure. Gritting his teeth at the wrong name, he lets the blue ball of energy at his palm grow, hissing through his teeth, “Send her away now!”

“QingXuan? Are you there?” this time, the knocking was louder.

Out of fear for the lady’s safety, Shi QingXuan threw his arms around He Xuan, “I—I’m here!” he called out as loud as he could, despite the trembling in his voice, which the lady did not fail to notice.

“Are you alright? May I come in?”

“No! No! Don’t!” Shi QingXuan shouts, squeezing He Xuan tighter, his hand grabbing He Xuan’s that was aimed at the door. He Xuan, for the record, was so stunned that the ball of energy instantly dissolved and his arms went limp.

“You don’t sound okay. Are you not feeling well?”

“Yes! I’m not feeling well. I’m really sorry, but can you leave? I promise I’ll make it up to you!”

“Do you want me to take care of—”

“It’s fine! Please! Just leave!”

“... I’ll see you at work. Please be well.”

“I will!” Shi QingXuan replies.

As the footsteps faded, he finally released He Xuan, before dizzily retreating backwards. But He Xuan was persistent and with each step backwards, he covered twice the distance.

Leveling a cold glare at Shi QingXuan, his tone scalding, “Shi Qing—”

“Why?!” Shi QingXuan whines, tears streaking down his face. He Xuan stops moving. “Why are you doing this?! Do I not deserve to be with—”

“Yes, you don’t!” He Xuan shouts, not wanting to hear the rest of the sentence. But the moment he caught sight of those tears, the words that should’ve followed were pushed back down and remained unspoken.

“Please. Why... are you doing this?” Shi QingXuan repeats. “Haven’t you had enough?”

He Xuan replied with silence. Shi QingXuan’s crying did not stop. No matter how much he repeated in his mind that he had to be strong, it did little to stop the tears from coming.

The sound of sniffling soon faded. When He Xuan sensed that Shi QingXuan was beginning to calm down, he quickly strides over to him.

“Hic…!” Shi QingXuan looked up and alarmed, was about to sprint away despite his shaking legs when strong arms wrapped around him from behind.

“Don’t move,” He Xuan rests his chin on Shi QingXuan’s shoulder.

Shi QingXuan wailed, his body trembling violently. “Waaahhh—”

“Just—stop crying! You don’t have to look at me!” He Xuan hisses, already frustrated that every reaction and look Shi QingXuan gives him was no different from a victim to a murderer. When he feels the sting of Shi QingXuan’s nails clawing at his arms, he tightens his embrace and tries his best to soften his voice, “Stop crying.”

“Waaahhhh—Ple—Please let me keep my h—head,” Shi QingXuan not only doesn’t stop crying but he also begins babbling. Due to He Xuan’s poor choice of words in an attempt to calm him down, it actually did the opposite.

Left with no other option, He Xuan tries to think, though this was the first time he had trouble trying to comfort Shi QingXuan which was quite reasonable ever since that incident. 

He has always been a quiet person and preferred being alone. Comforting people was certainly not his forte.

_Think. Think… what would… Crimson Rain do?_

Feeling his brow twitch involuntarily in irritation, He Xuan shoves his feelings aside about having to resort to another’s means, closes his eyes and kisses Shi QingXuan’s cheek.

Suddenly, the crying and wailing stopped, save for the shaking. When He Xuan opened his eyes, Shi QingXuan was looking at him over his shoulder, his eyes round as saucers.

Feeling his cheeks heat up even though he was dead, he inwardly clears his throat and thanks Hua Cheng in secret with a scowl.

Since it looked like it was somewhat effective, he turns Shi QingXuan around, but the latter collapses to the floor on his legs. He Xuan crouches down, lowers his head, then gently and carefully, he kisses away his tears, which leaves Shi QingXuan at a loss for words.

After what looked like some time but was actually only a minute or two, He Xuan squeezes Shi QingXuan’s shoulders, “I’m not going to hurt you.”

Shi QingXuan slowly looked up at him, his heart racing, not knowing whether the cause was due to fear or He Xuan’s unexpected gesture. But the pressure around his shoulders disappeared before he could look… along with He Xuan.

“Wow! This is a nice place!” Xie Lian looks around as he steps in. Hua Cheng follows behind, seeming to be in a good mood.

“Feel free to look around,” Shi QingXuan quickly heads to the kitchen.

Xie Lian looks around and catches sight of Shi QingXuan’s desk that had several finished paintings and a few that were in the making. “You taught him well,” Xie Lian says, admiring the paintings.

“Pft.”

“Hm? San Lang?” Xie Lian turns and finds Hua Cheng staring at an empty space near the wall facing the door.

Hua Cheng looks back at the sound of his name, “Ah, gege. It’s nothing.”

That night, after having dinner, Shi QingXuan sends them off. What puzzled him most was the fact that Hua Cheng was behaving oddly. The usual barbs in his comments were still there, but something about his gaze was different. As if he was seeing something he couldn’t. 

But Shi QingXuan leaves it as it is. Seeing Xie Lian and Hua Cheng gave him a tiny bit of courage. After putting everything away, he fixes another set of dinner on the table, thrice the amount a normal person could eat.

Even though he prepared food, it may not be enough to guarantee he'd stay as one piece. More so, this amount wouldn’t even suffice but this was the most his money can do. From the looks of it, He Xuan seemed like he was trying to reconcile with him.

Shi QingXuan takes a deep breath. Albeit the case, it also doesn’t mean he will not change his mind and rip his head off… should he mess up. Pacing a few steps around the dining table, he practices, “Ming—Young Master He, Young Master He, Young Master He…”

“What.”

“Gah!” Shi QingXuan turns at the sound of the voice so clearly exasperated. As though he summoned the demon himself, He Xuan was sitting where he placed the food.

Never mind that he appeared out of thin air again. Shi QingXuan was planning to shout out his name to call him anyway. But why… just why did he have to appear in his female form?!

“You called,” He Xuan says matter-of-factly, “so why are you surprised?”

“I… um…” Shi QingXuan fidgets, not daring to look straight at He Xuan out of fear that staring would offend her.

But this only seemed to displease He Xuan as her brows scrunched, eyeing Shi QingXuan with such intensity. “Sit down,” she says with obvious restraint.

Shi QingXuan obeys, stealing glances at her. For some reason, He Xuan's expression looked like she was in deep thought. “Young… Master He…” Shi QingXuan calls.

He Xuan’s line of sight snaps back at him. Then, she sweeps her gaze over the table, some of the bowls making their way towards Shi QingXuan. “...”

“Um… I prepared these… for you,” Shi QingXuan slowly says. “And I already—”

“I don’t care. Just eat with me,” He Xuan answers without looking up as she picked up her chopsticks and started eating. She waved a hand and a pair of chopsticks from the kitchen floated towards Shi QingXuan.

Thinking this was a rather kind gesture, Shi QingXuan plucked the chopsticks from the air and started eating as well.

A few minutes of silence was all it took for He Xuan to finish everything. Just as Shi QingXuan was halfway from finishing his bowl of vegetables in his hand, He Xuan suddenly leaned over. Stunned, Shi QingXuan’s eyes widened, followed by the clatter of chopsticks on the table. Faces inches from each other, He Xuan keeps her eyes trained on Shi QingXuan, but her chopsticks reach for the bowl. She takes a piece of the food and brings it to her mouth.

Meanwhile, Shi QingXuan was frozen in place. Seeing He Xuan up close eating from his bowl in her female form certainly did not help his nerves! Especially when memories of He Xuan using his lips to dry his tears come rushing back with great timing! And… is that makeup?

Feeling his cheeks heat up, while fighting to keep himself from laughing nervously, he brings the bowl closer to He Xuan, “Y—You can have it.”

This time, He Xuan’s expression shifted ever so slightly into a frown which went unnoticed by Shi QingXuan. She sits back down, “No. You eat it,” she says, as if she lost interest.

“Eh?” Shi QingXuan blinks. “Okay. Don’t mind if I do.”

As Shi QingXuan finished putting away the dishes, He Xuan wastes no time asking him, “Why did you call me?”

“... Young Master He… are you really not here to kill me?” Shi QingXuan asks.

“If I wanted to, I would have long ago. What’s the point of keeping you alive all this time?” He Xuan says. In that instant, she realized her words sounded harsh in her desire to make Shi QingXuan understand that it was indeed the case. So, she adds in a softer tone, “I’m telling you the truth.”

Shi QingXuan shifts in his seat, obviously uncomfortable, “You really mean it?”

“Yes,” He Xuan answers, “... and you can see her again.”

This time, Shi QingXuan unconsciously beams and rises from his seat, “Really—”

“Don’t cross the line,” He Xuan interjects strongly, causing Shi QingXuan to sit back down.

He Xuan looked like she was visibly upset, and her words sounded like a warning. The meaning of that warning, however, never crossed Shi QingXuan’s mind as he tries to lighten the mood despite his surprise, “Um, so why are you… er… in your female form?”

This time, He Xuan falls silent. Biting her lip subtly, she observes Shi QingXuan but finds only question marks all over his face. “None of your business,” she breathes sharply, as if she’s given up.

In truth, Shi QingXuan was also about to ask what the makeup was for. Even though it was so light that it wouldn’t be noticed from afar, still, this was He Xuan. But deciding his life was more important than uncovering this mystery, he drops the subject. He can bring it up someday after their wounds healed. However, Shi QingXuan did not entirely dismiss the idea that He Xuan indeed missed the times they spent in their female forms, oblivious of his intentions.

“Young Master He, do you happen to be free—”

“No,” He Xuan interrupts. “I came by because… I won’t be coming back for at least a week.”

In less than a day, new work piles up. The last time He Xuan went on a rampage and left his work after coming across a sight that wasn’t in his favor, work piled up like a mountain when he returned. He doesn’t get tired, but the work given to him has close deadlines. He had to catch up.

When the atmosphere dipped, Shi QingXuan immediately glossed over the subject, “It’s fine! Maybe—hahahahaha—um… come by anytime!”

“If you have something to say, say it now. I have time,” He Xuan says, careful with her tone so as not to scare Shi QingXuan off.

“Young Master He Xuan. You know… I really cherished you as my friend, right?”

He Xuan’s eye twitches in displeasure after a certain word left Shi QingXuan’s lips. Impatiently, she crosses her arms, “What of it?”

“I just—” _Please don’t kill me._ “I thought we should talk about it. What happened… I’m really… sorry. I know my apology means nothing to you, but I want you to know even if I called you all those times by the wrong name… I wasn’t referring to the real Ming Yi, but the person who’s always beside me. And that’s you.”

“…” He Xuan listens, unblinking. Her mind in turmoil, she dared not move lest who knows what might happen?

Worried that He Xuan wasn’t saying anything and unaware that his words were stirring her feelings, Shi QingXuan almost lost his nerve, but he continued, “I can never forgive you for killing ge. But I also don’t blame you for seeking revenge… I just wished… there could have been a better way.”

“...”

“And… and back then! When I told you how sorry I was, I really am sorry! I didn’t keep on repeating it solely because I wanted him to live. I called myself your best friend, but I had no idea… what you went through because of me and I’m so sorry.”

After a long moment of silence, He Xuan speaks, “... It wasn't all fake. I also… want to make things right.”

Shi QingXuan gives her a weak smile, “Will you forgive me?”

“I already did…” He Xuan answers, fixing her gaze on him. _It wasn’t even your fault._ “But I understand if you won’t.”

“Give me some time,” Shi QingXuan says.

“...”

“... Do you need something else?” Shi QingXuan asks, noting the signs that He Xuan was on the verge of speaking, but was restraining herself.

“No… Shi QingXuan… I’m sorry,” He Xuan says, before disappearing right in front of Shi QingXuan.

“I’m not mad, but you really shouldn’t push yourself too hard!”

“Okay, okay! I get it!” Shi QingXuan says defensively when his cheeks were pulled from both sides.

“Anyway, you did say you’ll make it up to me.”

“Yeah, I did. How about this weekend?”

“Shi QingXuan, you better not send me home all by myself again!”

“Ow! Ow, ow! It wasn’t my intention! Something just came up that day!”

“What? Were you having a stomach ache or something?”

“Well…”

“Hmm, you can tell me all about it this weekend. I told you, right? You can always rely on me.”

“... Thanks.”

“You called?” He Xuan stands at the doorway making no attempt to go in or hide his bad mood.

“I haven’t even said anything yet and you’re already this eager to leave?” Hua Cheng sits on the chair, smiling while pouring some tea.

“Be quick,” He Xuan snarls.

Contrary to his hostility, Hua Cheng's smile broadens, “Why don’t you sit down first and have tea?”

This time, He Xuan shouts, “Damn it, Crimson Rain! I don’t have time for this!”

“That’s new. I’ve never seen you lose your temper like this. Tell me, what is so important that you have to go rush somewhere?” Hua Cheng lifts a cup of tea to his lips.

“Do you know?”

“Know what?”

“If you know, I'm leaving.”

Hua Cheng turns his head to the side, closes his eyes and takes a sip, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. But if you want to leave, then leave. However, I expect your work for the day to be done tonight.”

He Xuan does. Prior to his engagement to Hua Cheng, he was already in a foul mood. One of his clones that was following Shi QingXuan suddenly lost him on the way. No matter where he looked, there was no sign of him. It couldn’t be helped. Clones have significantly reduced power compared to the real one. He was about to look into the matter himself when Hua Cheng summoned him via communication array.

Summoning back his clones which he thought were useless, he walks around the site where he heard Shi QingXuan and the girl agreed to meet up.

Invisible to the people around him, he scans the area. “Where is he?!” he shouts in frustration.

“Ahahahaha! Is that so?” Shi QingXuan laughs.

Agreeing to meet at the teashop they usually frequent, Shi QingXuan and the lady at work have been chatting for some time now.

“Yes, hahahaha—”

“But don’t you think you should take some time off work?” Shi QingXuan suddenly pulls a long face.

“No, it’s fine,” she says, “I can’t.”

“You know… it might not be good for the baby,” Shi QingXuan chides. “Besides, have you considered what I told you?

“That’s what I wanted to tell you for so long,” she says, smiling as she takes Shi QingXuan’s hands.

Shi QingXuan’s eyes grew wide, “Oh! You mean they agreed?!”

“Yes!” she squeals in excitement.

As they both hugged each other, Shi QingXuan suddenly saw a familiar back. “H—Hold on,” he says, pulling away. “Is that?”

“What?” she turns to look where Shi QingXuan was looking.

“Why is he here?” Shi QingXuan mumbles. An idea went over him, “Young—ahem,” he clears his throat, “He-xiong!” he calls out, waving his hand.

Not far from them, clad in black robes decorated with silver linings, He Xuan was looking around, as if he was lost in the crowd.

“Who’s that handsome youth?” she cranes her neck to get a better look.

“He’s my friend,” Shi QingXuan says, “He-xiong! Over here!” this time, he stood up, waving his hand vigorously.

But not once did He Xuan glance in his direction, even though he wasn’t even that far. When people began looking, Shi QingXuan let out a nervous laugh, embarrassed. Having decided to fetch He Xuan himself, he stopped in his tracks when He Xuan suddenly shouted.

“Where is he?!” he shouts to no one in particular.

“Eh?”

“Aren’t you going to invite him over?” the lady asks, looking over at Shi QingXuan.

“Um, maybe next time. He did say he would be busy this week. Moreover, maybe he was meeting up with someone?” Shi QingXuan says to her, but when he turns to look back at He Xuan, he wasn’t there anymore.

That night, he returned home. Taking off his outer robes, Shi QingXuan proceeds to fold it when he notices something red by the inner helm. “Hm?” Examining it closer, it looked like a blood stain of some sort. “Did I happen to be injured somewhere?” as soon as he asks the question, he quickly scolds himself, thinking he was rather stupid. Even if he was injured, his pants and inner robes will get stained first. His second look sent him blinking. The blood stain was small, the size of a small coin… and it was shaped like a flower.

Albeit a simple celebration, music and laughter filled the air. As Shi QingXuan resigned himself to eating and chatting with the people around him, his thoughts sometimes stray. Since that day when they asked each other for forgiveness, it has been three days since He Xuan last showed himself. Two if that encounter at the teashop would be considered.

Everything was peaceful and merry… until suddenly, the door slammed open, revealing a tall, dark figure, “Shi QingXuan!” came the thundering voice.

Shi QingXuan was forced to stand reflexively, feeling the air suddenly thicken with tension, “Huh? Young Master He, what are you doing here?!”

“Huh? Who is he?”

“Looks like a young master of a noble house.”

“Hmm. He looks rich. I wonder who he is here for again?”

The people began to whisper, each voicing their thoughts, not knowing the danger that stood in front of them.

Having heard their conversation, Shi QingXuan interrupts, “Ah, sir, no. He’s actually broke—ahem,” he clears his throat, scolding himself, praying that He Xuan wouldn’t notice. _What am I thinking?!_

Before, when he was still recovering, Hua Cheng once mentioned that as long as Shi QingXuan was under his wing, He Xuan wouldn’t dare come for him since he owed him a massive debt. Still, Shi QingXuan inwardly smacks himself for voicing it aloud.

To his relief, He Xuan ignored it but his next words puzzled him, “Stop this. Stop all of it.”

Shi QingXuan, “What? Why would we do that? What is with you?”

“Your life. It’s mine. I want you to stop now.” He Xuan demands.

“QingXuan—” the lady attempts to interject.

“Shut up, woman. He’s mine,” He Xuan sharply cuts her off, leveling a death glare at her.

Shi QingXuan swiftly puts himself between them. Another man pulls the lady behind him, “Young Master He, can’t you just—what is wrong this time? What happened was between you and me, do not drag them in. I thought we talked about it?”

He Xuan glances at the girl, then trains his eyes on Shi QingXuan. His fists clenched, he grits his teeth, “Then, how about this?” he says, dropping to his knees, “My life… is also yours as well.”

“...”

“...”

“... EH?!!??!!?!” the crowd exclaims in unison.

“Was that a confession of love?”

Shi QingXuan glances at his sides, “What the—YOUNG MASTER HE!”

He Xuan, with his head still lowered, continues with urgency, “I’ll do whatever it is you ask. Anything. If you want a woman, that’s fine. I can be one. In return, you have to stay with me.” He raises his head, “Don’t leave.”

“...” In that instant, speech seemed to have abandoned Shi QingXuan. The look in He Xuan’s eyes was pleading. 

_His… His Highness was right?! After I told him it wasn’t like that?!_

“Oh my, how romantic!”

“It is, but how could this be?”

“He must’ve made a mistake. Was he ill-informed?”

“He might be. Why else would he barge in here and confess to his beloved at someone else’s wedding?”

He Xuan blinks once, following the direction of that voice, “... What?”

The one who spoke was an elderly man in simple robes, “Young Master, did you not know?”

When it dawns on him at the same time, Shi QingXuan hurriedly explains, “He-xiong! It’s not what you think! I’m not getting married! It’s not me!”

“QingXuan! Why didn’t you tell me he was your lover?” the lady crosses her arms at Shi QingXuan.

“Jie?!” Shi QingXuan shrieks.

He Xuan remains silent, at a loss that his efforts to stop Shi QingXuan in a somewhat peaceful manner wasn’t even necessary. That everything was a misunderstanding.

“And you even said he was busy! If he wasn’t, I would have invited him, too!” she scolds. Slipping her way towards He Xuan, she pulls him to his feet, “Come, Young Master He. Take a seat.”

He Xuan let her and just like that, the wedding celebration continued without any more problems.

“I can explain,” He Xuan paces after Shi QingXuan around the dining table.

“What is there to explain? You came and ruined my jie’s wedding! Is there anything else you’d like to add to the damage?!” Shi QingXuan slaps a hand to his forehead, stopping in his tracks.

Although the wedding wasn’t exactly ruined, and if anything it became even more festive, He Xuan doesn’t contradict him. Biting his lip, he mumbles, “I thought—”

“You thought what?!”

“I—I thought you and her…” He Xuan trails off. 

It was rather strange that he didn’t find anything about the woman having a lover. When he tried to look into the lady’s background, he couldn’t find anything save for her being a daughter of a noble house. So why… was she working in the entertainment district as a dancer? Moreover, several figures in that celebration certainly looked wealthy, which must be members of her family, but the rest looked like commoners. The husband, too.

Shi QingXuan’s mouth drops, “What the—what made you think we’re in that kind of relationship?!” Suddenly, it made sense. That day He Xuan appeared in his female form and the strange behavior. “Why didn’t you just ask me?!” Shi QingXuan snaps at him.

“How can I when you tremble in fear at the sight of my face? For all I know, you would’ve lied thinking I’d kill her!”

“Why wouldn’t I?! Try looking in a mirror to see how scary your face is!”

“Shi QingXuan, you—”

“Uhh, H—He-xiong, wait! Just wait! Look, tell me what made you think that,” Shi QingXuan suddenly waves his hands, like he was trying to pacify a beast that was about to go on a rampage.

After a long silence, they both decided to sit down and talk. As Shi QingXuan explains, the deeper the crease forms between He Xuan’s brows. The apparent date in He Xuan’s eyes was just an innocent invitation for Shi QingXuan to attend the celebration.

As it turns out, the woman was indeed, from a wealthy family who fell in love with a commoner. Naturally, her family didn’t approve of the relationship, so she ran away and ended up here. Not knowing how to get by, she was forced to work as a dancer and met Shi QingXuan who took care of her. Meanwhile, the man at the celebration who pulled her behind him after Shi QingXuan stepped in between them happened to be her lover. After she got pregnant, the man doubled his efforts and eventually acquired a stable job. 

Shi QingXuan, on the other hand, gave her the idea to at least write to her family and tell them the news to prove that she can handle her own. He heard enough to discern that her family only wanted the best for her. And now that she wrote to them, they agreed to make amends and attend her wedding.

As the story went on, eventually, the teashop incident was also brought to light.

“You were there?” He Xuan clarifies.

“Yes, I even called you but you wouldn’t look at me. I thought you turned deaf.”

“Get lost.”

When it was He Xuan’s turn to be interrogated, Shi QingXuan was surprised, “Wait… were you following me?”

Sighing resignedly, He Xuan looks away, “Not… exactly.”

“He-xiong,” Shi QingXuan scolds.

He Xuan changes the subject, “Anyway, people weren’t supposed to see me. You mentioned she saw me. Why is that?”

Shi QingXuan freezes. Not only was He Xuan effective in steering his attention away from his stalking habits, he also successfully reminded Shi QingXuan about the embarrassing moment people looked at him as if he was crazy.

Waving off the memory, Shi QingXuan focuses on the topic at hand. Why was she able to see He Xuan? “I don’t know.”

“Shi QingXuan, did you notice anything strange back then?”

“Hm… let me think,” Shi QingXuan ponders. Then, “Oh! There was, um, some sort of blood staining my robes.”

“Show me.” He Xuan orders. Shi QingXuan digs around his laundry. After he finds the robe, he gives it to He Xuan.

The instant He Xuan sees the stain, he closes his eyes, breathing sharply. Taking this as an indication that the case was solved, Shi QingXuan asks, “So… what is it?”

He Xuan, gritting his teeth in anger, mutters, “Crimson Rain…”

Why didn’t he notice it before? The answers were right there in front of him from the beginning! Ghost City didn’t need his assistance! Moreover, why all of a sudden was he bombarded with work? Of course it was to limit his movements! And the reason why he couldn’t see Shi QingXuan that day—

“Crimson Rain!” He Xuan slams the door open to Puqi shrine.

As if he was expected, Hua Cheng gives him an amused look, “Black Water. I see you developed a new habit of banging doors open.”

“San Lang! Who is it?” Xie Lian calls out from the kitchen.

“It’s nothing, gege!” Hua Cheng answers. “So, why are you here?”

“Don’t play dumb. It was you, wasn’t it?”

“Why don’t you complete your sentence if you want some answers?”

He Xuan scowls, “Ghost City didn’t need my help. You had Yin Yu.”

“Right. But I told you I was just offering you a stable means to repay your debt. And why did you accept in the first place? I wasn’t even forcing you.”

“... I couldn’t find anything about that woman, was it also you?” He Xuan demands.

“I thought you were smarter than this,” Hua Cheng rolls his eyes.

“You—”

“I what? Go on,” Hua Cheng smirks.

“And that array. That’s also you,” He Xuan says.

The array He Xuan was pertaining to was that blood-stain flower on Shi QingXuan’s robes. The reason Shi QingXuan could see him but not the other way around. It was also the reason the noble lady was able to see him, because she was sitting close to Shi QingXuan, thus, was inside its area of effect. He could’ve detected it and destroyed it if Shi QingXuan went closer to him.

“That’s more like it. But you can’t win if you get that distracted. I was worried I had to wait for another era to rise and fall before you found out,” Hua Cheng chuckles. “And don’t you think they needed some privacy but you weren’t giving them any?”

“Was it fun?!” He Xuan snarls at him.

“Entertaining. Better be grateful for the results, though. Otherwise, with your methods—”

“Black Water Demon Xuan?” Xie Lian steps out, holding a pot.

“...” He Xuan doesn’t hear the rest of Hua Cheng’s sentence as he carefully eyes the pot like a bomb.

“Gege, that looks good,” Hua Cheng, completely losing interest in He Xuan, comes over to help him settle the pot on the table.

“Why don’t you join us for dinner?” Xie Lian beckons He Xuan over.

He Xuan cautiously takes a step back, “Uh… I remember I have someplace I need to be.” And with that, he takes off.

Having just returned from the shops to buy some ink, the weather turned for the worse, which left Shi QingXuan under the roof of some establishment to wait it out. But after hours of waiting, it didn’t seem like it was going to stop.

“I want to go home,” Shi QingXuan sighs, pulling his robes over his head. Then, he sets out, running as fast as he could… when he suddenly slipped and fell on his back. “Ow!”

His robes soaked through, he got up and decided it was best to just walk since he was wet anyway. And he definitely wasn’t asking for another painful fall.

As he walked closer to his home, a hand suddenly seized him, causing him to let out an undignified shriek. When he recognizes who it was, “Oh. It’s you.”

“What are you doing in the rain?” He Xuan demands, already pulling him along.

“I j—just went out, I didn’t know it was going to rain,” Shi QingXuan timidly says.

“...” He Xuan wordlessly drags him inside. After grabbing a tub and heating some water, he pulls Shi QingXuan over, stripping him naked.

“I—I can do it myself!” Shi QingXuan protests. Feeling his cheeks blush, Shi QingXuan suddenly remembered what he had forgotten to discuss with He Xuan… his confession at the celebration. He Xuan never brought it up either and caught up with Hua Cheng’s mischief, the matter was entirely buried and unresolved. But now that his robes were being forced open, Shi QingXuan couldn’t help but feel awkward.

“Shut up. Get in before you catch a cold and become a bigger headache,” He Xuan finishes stripping him. Then, he carries the wet clothes and exits the room.

Left alone, Shi QingXuan begins scrubbing himself. Even though he was soaked earlier, thankfully the mud and grime stuck to his clothes and not his skin. 

But the sound of the door opening again causes him to yelp. When he turns, He Xuan steps in, hands behind his back. Maybe he forgot something? Never mind that. As soon as the floating stool behind He Xuan came into view, Shi QingXuan’s blood ran cold.

Not finding the words to say, he watched He Xuan leisurely stride over to him with the stool settling beside the tub first, followed by the click of the door. And just like that, He Xuan plops down on the stool, crosses his arms and continues watching him.

As the staring contest went on, finally Shi QingXuan spoke, “Er… um… I'm taking a bath?”

“And?” He Xuan says simply.

“I can't do this with you watching me.”

“You used to take baths with me back in the heavenly court.”

The memories where he’d barge in the palace of the Earth Master to take baths with He Xuan momentarily silences him.

“That's… that's different!”

“How is it different? We're both men, so what does it matter?” He Xuan counters.

Shi QingXuan was about to answer when the answer itself hit him with realization. Based on He Xuan’s words, it looked like he was pushing him to touch the forgotten subject. The reason he came to the wedding. And as much as he wanted to clarify everything as well, he wasn’t sure bringing up the subject in this setup—him being naked and all—was the best idea.

“A—Anyway, can't you just go? I'll go out once I'm done.”

“No. Tell me what's different first.”

Shi QingXuan loses his patience, “DIFFERENT? THE DIFFERENCE IS RIGHT NOW, I'M TAKING A BATH IN FRONT OF A MAN WHO TOLD ME WHO TOLD ME—WHO TOLD ME—”

“—I love you,” He Xuan’s voice overlaps with his, completing his sentence.

Shi QingXuan lowers his gaze, completely mortified. “I—I’m done.” He looks around. 

He Xuan understood and with a wave of his hand, dry and clean robes were summoned to the room.

“...” He Xuan takes one last look at the pink that has already spread all over Shi QingXuan’s face to his chest before he stands and leaves.

Soon, Shi QingXuan emerges from the comfort room. “I’ll see you, tomorrow. You should go home.”

He Xuan, who was sitting in the dining area, gets up and walks over to him, “I’m staying here.”

“W—WHAT?!” Shi QingXuan’s eyes grew twice their size. “WHY?!”

“Keep it down,” He Xuan hisses. “If you want to know, then here!” he slaps a hand to Shi QingXuan’s shoulder, sending what felt like an electrical current throughout his body. Then, he places two fingers on his temple, “Crimson Rain. Tell him.”

Shi QingXuan, “Huh? What does Crimson Rain Sought Flower have to do with—”

“Lord Wind Master,” Hua Cheng interrupts, not even a shred of surprise in his tone. “Black Water has nowhere to go.”

“What do you mean?”

“His debt is huge. And he randomly abandons his work. I’m taking Nether Water Manor as collateral and I’m kicking him out. But feel free to kick him out on the streets as well.”

Shi QingXuan swears he felt Hua Cheng smirk from there. “W—Wait, Crimson Rain, give him another—”

As if he read Shi QingXuan’s mind, Hua Cheng says, “Like I said, if you don’t want him, kick him out.” Then, Hua Cheng mentions a certain date that He Xuan suddenly left in the middle of urgent work. Shi QingXuan’s heart was throwing a fit because… that was the same day as his shijie’s wedding!

“Crimson Rain,” He Xuan interjects, “Is Nether Water Manor enough?”

“... That covers it,” Hua Cheng answers.

“It’s yours,” He Xuan says.

“What are you doing?! He-xiong, why are you—Crimson Rain Sought Flower, just hold on!” Shi QingXuan panics.

“That settles it. Enjoy,” Hua Cheng ignores him and steps out of the communication array.

“H—Hey! Wait!” Shi QingXuan calls out.

“It’s done,” He Xuan removes his fingers. “That place… has no good memories anyway.”

“What about them?” Shi QingXuan asks, his gaze lowered. 

“... I’ve already taken care of everything.”

“... That’s good. So… um, He-xiong, I’ll go make preparations,” Shi QingXuan says, when He Xuan grabs him, locking him in an embrace.

“I haven’t said it properly. So, hear me out.”

“He-xiong…” Shi QingXuan couldn’t see his face but the slight tremor in He Xuan’s voice was enough to tell him as much. “Alright.”

“... I’m sorry,” He Xuan starts, his voice hoarse. “What happened with him… I’m so sorry I tried to push you to make a horrible choice… and made you witness your brother’s death. I’m so sorry you ended up like this, that I abandoned you…”

Every apology He Xuan gave, Shi QingXuan listened. About that incident, saying that he did not deserve anyone, the spies, threatening to kill his shijie who came by his house, as well as the wedding incident.

“I know I can never make up for what I’ve done. I’m supposed to be happy, now that I had my revenge… but everyday was worse, miserable. I can’t… exist without you. It’s my fault. I refused to yield. I wanted him to suffer, to perish… knowing it would hurt you in the process. I couldn’t let it go. I’m a fool, aren’t I? I succumbed to revenge even though I knew deep inside that I valued our friendship more, but I went and gave it up instead. And… at that time on the boat… Shi QingXuan… I wished so badly that for once, you’d choose me,” the last sentence was almost a whisper as He Xuan completely breaks down.

“He-xiong!” Shi QingXuan immediately pulls away, clasping He Xuan’s face with both hands. As if the tears were contagious, his eyes began tearing up as well. “Listen to me. I told you I don’t blame you for seeking revenge, although I wish you spared him… Hey! Hey, look at me!”

“I love you… I love you, Shi QingXuan,” He Xuan says quietly, eyes heavily blurred with tears. “I know it’s too late but I—I’ll do whatever you want. I’ll disappear if you want me to—”

“Stop spewing nonsense!” Shi QingXuan scolds, “He-xiong… I already lost ge. Do you really think I’d be happy to lose you, too? Then, why don’t I just go ahead and kill myself as well?!”

“I love you so much,” He Xuan repeats, more tears coming.

Shi QingXuan swiftly leans in, pressing his lips to He Xuan’s, which the latter accepts. After who knows how long, Shi QingXuan pulls away, pressing his forehead to He Xuan’s, “I love you, too, He-xiong.”

**Author's Note:**

> Been stuck for a year or two but decided to finish it today. Enjoy ♡
> 
> Also special thanks to a friend ( ꈍᴗꈍ)


End file.
